Shot Clock

It seems I’ve developed a penchant for sudden ejections, like a misbehaved WNBA star, mouthing off to refs with truth sometimes too assaulting to absorb but difficult to deny, or using an unnecessarily rough body check, with brutal language that beguiles.  Correction, more akin to NBA stars, like Andrew Bynum, cuz the ladies hardly ever get ejections, but then I digress.

One of my wing gents Sharath Mekala once told me, “You need the [24-second] shot clock rule!”  By this declaration, I suspect he meant that my (over)zealous self-expression overwhelmed him like a full-force verbal fire hose, took too long and left him feeling hurt and unheard, instead of informed and inspired.

Apparently, on this court of life, although I COULD become a highly skilled player, more than likely I won’t get any playing time or achieve acclaim if I don’t learn to work the rules to my advantage.  Even more threatening, I soon won’t have any team mates or opponents with which to hone skills. Given these bleak prospects, I see the serious need for change.

I sincerely regret that my uncivil, disrespectful behavior has driven some of you out of the arena of our relationship.  This game ain’t even fun anymore without you. I miss you and want you back.

For those who’ve experienced my exuberance as exhibitionism instead of excellence, my zest as zaniness instead of Zion, my opinions as obstacles instead of opportunities, I sincerely apologize. I ask that you please forgive my self-absorbed, self-serving schemes, my brash and baby-ish banter of the past.  I also request that you call me out during any future lapses, whether large or small, and hold me accountable for cleaning up any harm/damage I unwittingly do.

I trust you’ll be patient while I seek and destroy residual “LOOK@ME!” demon roots, pull them like pesky weeds in an otherwise Eden-esk Garden I’m endeavoring to make of my life.  A simple sign will do: just say “SHOT CLOCK” or make a buzzer sound and I promise to pause and hear you out, then take some self-imposed quiet time on the bench, after getting counsel from The Coach.

I therefore commit myself now to being a “good sportswoman,” more attentive, flexible, respectful and open, less argumentative, opinionated, judgmental & irreverent.  Now won’t you come back to the game?  Let me practice my new “playing well with others” techniques?  I trust when you’re ready, we’ll all be better players having had these sometimes painful growth experiences. I anxiously await your generous and gracious return.  Namaste.



  1. shadun said,

    September 3, 2011 at 1:44 pm

    It takes courage, more, it takes rare and selfless wisdon to admit a shortcoming publically. The wisest of players have an internal rhythm of “the game”. They know the rules…because they contributed towards writing them. Sometimes they may go too far in attempting to expand the game’s dimensions and limits. But, their love of the game and especially its players return them to their original desire, which is to become an even better player.

  2. September 3, 2011 at 4:29 pm

    This is great Julie. Don’t know the old you, but definitely looking forward to working with the new you. I’ll remember the part about “shot clock” and practice my buzzer sound but I don’t think I’ll need it.

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